UNLEASHED, UNCUT, UNREAD



9.29.2005

Of note

Right now, in Alaska, a statewide manhunt is underway to catch Robert "Papa Pilgrim" Hale. Papa Pilgrim, the locally famous patriarch of the 17-member Hale clan, has fled in a camper van from 30 charges including sexual assualt, kidnapping, coercion, and incest. The Anchorage Daily News had this to report:

The 17-member family, bound by strict rules that Hale drew from his reading of the Bible, broke apart last winter after a single, horrific episode, described by troopers this week. They said Hale locked a daughter in a small shack on family property near the Kennicott River in McCarthy and raped her repeatedly. Some other family members knew she was in there, heard suspicious sounds and were concerned, troopers said.
It's hard to imagine this stuff even happens these days. Luckily, the chances of Hale escaping unnoticed before winter bears down is almost nonexistent (you try escaping with an 18-inch beard, pilgrim hat, and camper truck). If he tries to hold out past that point, I'm guessing mother nature will apply final justice.

Also, I would give most things to be in San Francisco right now to check out this urban ski-jump of all urban ski-jumps. Unfortunately, my friend Tyson still hates America, so I don't know if his brother Tanner's taking part or not (of note, of note, I was in Manhattan for that road race last weekend, but the man made me work right through it...here's the results showing Alan Webb in 2nd behind Craig Mottram).

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

In true pilgrim fashion, I'm sure he'll turn up this Thanksgiving.

Phil said...

...then maybe we can let the Native Americans exact their revenge for the scourge of the white man my scalping Papa P. It's all so dramatic.